11 Jun 2009

News from Style: Failure Versus Sucess

Embora qualquer um se possa inscrever na sua mailing list, confesso que é bom receber novidades do Style. São sempre momentos inspiradores:
PS: Já vos disse que vocês caros amigos PUA-PTs são demais? e vão arranjar monte de openers e HBs? :) hehehe

Style wrote:

Here is the key distinction:
The guy who fails at the game is the one who goes out looking for women to make him
feel good about himself.
The guy who succeeds at the game is the one who goes out and makes other people feel good
about themselves.

This first type of guy, no one wants to be around.
He is needy. He is insecure. He is reaction-seeking.
He will suck your energy dry in his selfish quest for your validation and approval.
This second type of guy is easy to be with. He radiates charisma and positive energy. You enjoy his company, as do your friends, and you want him around all the time. You trust him, feel comfortable with him, end up at his house at 5 a.m. wondering where all that time went.
Both guys do and say the exact same things but get a very different reaction from women because of the intent they are communicating.
WAIT a minute, you may say: What about negs? Their use seems to contradict this idea of making people feel good about themselves.
Think again.
When you give a woman who's often hit on a generic compliment, she will usually either ignore the remark or assume you're saying it because you want to sleep with her.
When you tease her and show her that you're unaffected by her beauty and demonstrate that you're out of her league - and THEN let her work to win you over and ultimately REWARD her with your approval, she will leave that night feeling good about herself. Like something special happened and she connected with somebody who appreciates her for who she REALLY is.
In short, a neg will buy you the credibility you need to sincerely compliment her later.
That said, I don't necessarily advocate negs; they are in many ways a temporary patch to stick onto your personality while you learn to possess real confidence and strength of character.
So, to drive this all home, here's an assignment I gave the guys in the Stylelife Challenge: Your
mission this week is to make five people feel better about themselves - with no thought as to how you come across in the process.
This can include anything from telling a parent how much you appreciate them; to making an awkward guest at a party feel wanted and included; to telling a person who just blew a lot of money on a car/outfit/ haircut how cool it looks; to giving a homeless person eye contact, smiling, and handing them five dollars.
Start developing an instinct for what someone needs to feel good about themselves and their choices, and stop worrying about what they think of you.
Pretty soon, it'll become a habit, and you'll be a social magnet forced to sign up for Half Your Dating seminars to stop your cell phone from ringing all the time.

In Your Corner,

P.S. Did I mention how charismatic you look today? And I love that thing you did just now. Keep it up!

1 comment:

  1. i guess this is what they mean by leaving someone better of but how does that work after you sleepd wid her? Anyway i must say i often times feel like i am the guy who is sucking up all the energy as style puts it i guess i need to mayb communicate better not sure how but a good pua said it takes pratice i do pratice but dnt often see improvements